work stinks! YEAH YEAH. work stinks! YEAH YEAH. ive been working since monday at my dads office. i wonder if its too soon to take a couple sick days. we'll see. i actually was able to be allowed to take off next week (i know, a phenomenal work ethic i have)....well, ive noticed the progression of my clothes has mirrored the progression of my attitude, work ethic, and ultimately love for life. monday i started things off with khakis, nice shoes and a button down shirt. tuesday, i lost the button down shirt for a nice collared shirt. wednesday i lost the "nice" in collared shirt along with going for sneakers. im not sure how the following weeks will ensue...

-broach

miami is nice.

-Broach

well i just got my final grade in chem...C...a great start for someone in the field of medicine

-fuckin broach

nice little link provided by will...some stuff is gross, most is funny

one personal favorite:
95) Game of Smiles: This game involves men sitting around a circular table and a woman giving random blowjobs underneath the table. Anyone who "smiles" has to buy a round of beer for the rest. It's a Boy's Town specialty!

also, the term "balloon knot" is great

-coach and broach

Johnnyboy213 (1:37:11 PM): did you know that with iguanas, males fight over the females so only the biggest and stronges males get to mate and these males basically have a harem of females. So the only chance for a smaller male to mate is to sneak into the harem when the large males isnt looking quickly mate with a female. The only problem is that he usually wont have time to finish before the large male sees what he's doing and then kicks him out. So these small males have come up with a way to have "pre-sex" by themselves and then keep the sperm on the edge of their genitalia and then they quickly run into the harem and stick it in a female and leave before the female or the alpha male even realize anything has even happened........ i think we can all learn from these iguanas.

-c&b

hi my name is leon ("hi leon")...ummm i had been using for about three years. it had gotten tot the point where it was interfering with my life. Luckily, about 4 weeks ago i found a program that works, and ive been clean for 27 days. its called "Dr. Jones' Three Steps to Success: stopping the Tetris Addiction for Good." It truly works and i will briefly explain the three step process. For the first week, you must simply try to cut down the amount of time playing, not by a lot, but by some. the second week is where the interesting part comes in. every other day you receive intermittent doses of Snood as a way of weaning you off Tetris. By the third week Snood should have completely taken the place of Tetris. Although Snood is very addictive as well, it doesnt have half the adverse affects that Tetris does. The following step is optional, only if u want to eliminate the snood playing as well. you repeat the first steps that u did with the Tetris but now you will be weaning yourself onto masturbation, a very happy medium. good luck to all and thank you Dr. Jones!

-broachy

d0mmm (4:21:12 PM): hmm?
lil dosman (4:21:26 PM): ?
d0mmm (4:21:42 PM): do you remember that
d0mmm (4:21:43 PM): kid
d0mmm (4:21:45 PM): from the ladybugs
lil dosman (4:21:48 PM): oh
lil dosman (4:21:52 PM): yea
lil dosman (4:21:56 PM): "jonathon brandis"
d0mmm (4:22:00 PM): yea
d0mmm (4:22:03 PM): he hung himself last week
lil dosman (4:22:17 PM): oh.
lil dosman (4:22:18 PM): shit.
d0mmm (4:22:37 PM): heh
d0mmm (4:22:57 PM): well he had every reason to
d0mmm (4:23:03 PM): did you ever see neverending story 2?
d0mmm (4:23:06 PM): jesus christ

-coachandbroach

great game provided by mitchy...the blonde girl has an amazing rack
we love our girlfriends.

-coach and broach

i think it was always bullshit when they would lose the flag in the mouth or tub full of green shit. u know, this has nothing to do with an extreme challenge and thats the only aspect of Double Dare that i never liked. sorry, it was just something thats been plagueing me that i needed to get off my chest.

-Broachaloach

yeah so HERE are some pics from the naked quad run. the associates here at coach and broach would like to tell our girlfriends that these pictures were neither taken by us or...uhhh...condoned by us. uhh yeah.

-c and b

a great collection of games added to the links section
so far i've only played madness interactive, which is sweet once you learn how to play...and seconds of madness which is real trippy

-coach

there is something i would like to say. i do not want to take away anything from lebron james cuz i do think hes the shit and is gonna be amazing. but i think that there needs to be more of an emphasis on the other rook in the league. a lad who goes by the alias "melo." how about the fact that carmelo averages more points (in less minutes), more rebounds, and his team is ten games ahead of lebron's. i swear to god id lebron wins rookie of the year ahead of carmelo im gonna shit on someones face. twice. late

-broach

well as you may have already assumed, dominique did not run it was all a big trick...we did see andy make a pass, although we couldn't tell if he was naked or wearing a bear suit...and don't worry he said that if he finds any pictures of himself he'll be sure to pass them along..

the run itself was quite the event..the crowd was huge and the runner were wasted, as expected...it was great to see naked people just stop running on the track, traverse the quad and dive head first through the snow...brrr...the only downer was the occasional black dude that would slow it down and chat with the crowd as if to say "lemme just slow my pace down here so you all can get a nice shot of my enormous tyrannasaurus wang"

edit: added a lil pic of the scene, just so you can get an idea of the amount of crowd support these naked nilly's get
there's actually steel barriers, like at a concert or something, keeping a nice little track for the runners, and behind that is the crowd...you can't really see the nekkids in this pic but observe the way the crowd lines up along the whole track...also note the amount of fuckin snow on the ground.

look at me!

-coachnbroach

-and for dessert, i'll have 16 hours of sleep.
-and how would you like that served?
-with some crazy dreams on the side please.
-very well sir, excellent choice.

-coach

Max W83 (3:42:14 AM): surfers have been saved by dolphins in santa cruz
Max W83 (3:42:18 AM): from sharks

and with that, dolphins are the undisputed amazing awesomeness from the mystic blue something

-c n b

d0mmm (1:36:45 AM): i wish i could send you this conversation i just had
d0mmm (1:36:48 AM): with this guy
d0mmm (1:36:57 AM): i havent talked to in a while
d0mmm (1:37:09 AM): where the fuck you been man
d0mmm (1:37:16 AM): "just got back from basic training camp"
d0mmm (1:37:22 AM): jesus how was it
d0mmm (1:37:25 AM): "i hated it"
d0mmm (1:37:31 AM): so wtf are you a marine now?
d0mmm (1:37:39 AM): "im infantry"
d0mmm (1:37:46 AM): holy shit in the reserves?
d0mmm (1:37:50 AM): "nope active army"
d0mmm (1:38:05 AM): dont guys in the infantry just get wiped out instantly by artillery fire
d0mmm (1:38:27 AM): "yea infantry is annihilated pretty fast hopefully ill survive when they send me to korea"
d0mmm (1:38:37 AM): why the fuck did you sign up for infantry?!
d0mmm (1:38:51 AM): "well i was stoned at the time and had just finised a game of counterstrike"
d0mmm (1:38:57 AM): "so i said, infantry it is."
d0mmm (1:39:14 AM): "i should have gone to college instead like all normal teenagers."

=\

Auto response from A Spec0987 (8:28:29 PM): pregaming for quad run
Auto response from southpawlynx (8:29:08 PM): gymn.....andy, just dont fall man and ull be golden
PDiDdY54 (8:30:01 PM): yea so i guess that means everyone at tufts is gonna be subjected to spectors hairy ass

-blegh

alright so this is me on the right, and mike on the left.

-broach

gay

dont fuck with outkast

-c and b

LonnieJonesBro (2:56:01 AM): ahhhh
LonnieJonesBro (2:56:04 AM): so smart my man
Bassboss4 (2:56:27 AM): alittle high 2
LonnieJonesBro (2:56:54 AM): of course
Bassboss4 (2:57:20 AM): if i werent for ppl like us there will no snack food industry.

-alskdjfsl

Auto response from Berg of G (12:15:51 AM): Wow the BCS is a great system. Despite the fact that any human (including both human polls) can tell you that USC is the best team in the country, computers, which don't watch the games, disagree. Theres no way these computers that the BCS uses could be wrong considering half of them have Miami ranked #4! No, not Miami, Florida, but Miami of Ohio. The team that is ranked #14 in the human polls and only played one decent team all year- Iowa who destroyed them. The only good news for USC is that when they beat Michigan in the Rose Bowl, they will be the AP Poll National Champion, thus creating two separate national champions, the exact scenario the BCS was created to prevent. Ivan Maisel said it best, "college football embarrassed itself". 8 team playoff please…

-coach and broach

LonnieJonesBro (2:34:13 AM): poop
lil dosman (2:42:48 AM): we're such dorks
lil dosman (2:42:58 AM): people are chilling in our room and we're playing tetris...
lil dosman (2:43:04 AM): "well i guess im out..."

-coacheyandbroachey

so me and mike went to this day care to do this child development "observation." of course instead of just observating, we were damn well gonna play with these 4 year olds. We were the coolest kids on the playground. apparently they had a hard time pronouncing our names- mike turned into "Mug" and leo somehow turned into "B." The "B" evolved to "B-B" and then, inevitably of course, to "Pee-Pee." but thats how life goes on the cold hardtop of the playground.

-C & B

i believe theres nothing in this world that tastes better than the first five seconds of the white tic tac.

-broach

this is to the FUCKER who lated our delightful Snowy...what the fuck is your problem you heartless bastard? what do u think he's just some fucking nothing that asks to be kicked? cuz hes not! You know, its not like a goddam sandcastle, whose sole purpose on this earth is to get stomped, smashed and kicked. frankly, i wish death upon u and your family. and gonnarhea.

this is a terrible day. from now on, december 5 will be known as Snowy Mcpeepsack Remembrance Day.

-two glum bros

quote of the day:

from the hallway, where omniscient eric, number 2, and hotsy rotc are discussing stratego, risk, or some other board game of world domination played by people who refuse to venture outside of their own rooms.

eric: well do you want to be a nice guy? or do you want prague?

-coach and broach

i see your camel toe
-sara

-coach and broach

http://www.ninemillion.com/nm/video/wheresmychange.wmv
-dom

-coach and broach

i'm reluctant to use the word "watching," but...somebody stop me...the simple life is on my tv, and i'm looking at it...the only excuse is paris hilton, of course, but she actually gets you to watch the show which is itself pitiful.

in my own defense, they do spend a lot of time laying on each other, however, i feel like a worse person every minute it's on

-coach

anybody seen the new old navy commercial with full-blown what's-her-face, fran drescher, doing her best jessi berrin impression?

(annoying accent) - "my shizzle's gone fazizzle"
(annoyinly negative-funny laugh)

frightening.

-coach

http://www.canada.com/vancouver/theprovince/story.asp?id=1287951D-3D38-4169-B4B1-F317BF4BBF05
-smitty

-coach and broach

so we've all wondered exactly what the fuck is clubmed? well prepare to be enlightened: its the best thing ever. howcome everyone talks shit about people who go on clubmed trips? according to the commercial its amazing...its a secret society like the stonecutters, except their mutant ability is that they know all these "wicked nasty" places to stay in jamaica and the bahamas and shit really cheap



-coach and broach

my name is snowy and iss ma birfday

-coach and broach

ANT753: smoke and tan
ANT753: best
ANT753: the true bake and bake

well said

-C&B

congratulations, malady, you are the proud owner of me for an extra 12 hours...

apparently my flight was at 730 am...as there's no way that could have been intentional, i obviously missed it

-coach

anyone who owned a nintendo growing up would be doing themselves a great service to check this out.

if you're not using microsoft internet explorer:
right click and save target
or
right click and copy hyperlink url, open windows media player, file-->open url...-->paste

-coach

Auto response from Max W83: after watching mtv's "rich girls" for less than five minutes, i have completely lost faith in my generation. this might seem harsh but consider this quote: "kids in the midwest don't buy cargo pants because theyre popular, they buy them because they have a lot of pockets and they need them because they work in the fields" -idiot rich girl

-coach and broach

well i did it again...i should just learn my lesson and stop trying to take my girlfriend home cuz every time i do, i get a ticket for something.
oh yea, i also had my license confiscated this time. i can't drive anymore.
oh yea, the taco bell, from which i was 10 yards and approaching, closed while the douche bag cop was taking his sweetass time to write me a ticket for my fucking tints at 3am...happy thanksgiving cocksmoker
oh yea, my window also broke and wont go up

fuck you god, and your little world too

-coach

take me down to the paradise city where the grass is green and my lady is pretty.

-coach

excerpt from the next juice song:

"...i dont care what goddam hour, i love pissing in the goddam shower..."

- broach

Auto response from vAnDe1786 (2:58:55 PM): Have you ever wondered how we got milk? What makes a person decide, "Hey I think I am gonna go over to that cow and pull on those things hanging down and drink whatever comes out."

-coach and broach

auto response from loudmoutho: It's about that time to party in the city where the heat is on, all night on the beach to the break of dawn...

....

-coach and broach

it was good to see the poll get up to 26 votes, although one was accidentally placed for the left, by coachy mcguy, while wasted..
i didnt realize that many people pay attention to us but encouraging nonetheless

-coach and broach

Auto response from IanP84 (10:22:20 AM): let me tell you a little story,
there was this time when i was sitting in my room, watching tv.. i decide that i am bored with that channel that i am watching and proceed to change the channel with my right hand only.. being the amateur channel changer that i am, i drop the remote, and try to be very very sneaky... i go really fast and hard to try to grab the remote before it hits the gound and guess what happens? yes you are correct- i hit my right testicle will full force and cause this pain that i have not felt in years, de balls in de stomach, yes it is de worst pain of dem all, good late to me i will be crying for years

-cnb

i think its great that absolutely every person has a countdown to miami. well 'tis the shit i must agree and uhh...two days till miami WOOOOHOOOOOO

-broach

apparently this is the message we left for our resident director, tim, last night on his chalkboard...
drunk much? you can sort of make out the ninja turtles that were the start of the whole debachle...michaelangelo on the left is more decipherable
may or may not be a game of tic-tac-toe in the middle

-coach and broach

kids that didn't grow up sharing the name of a ninja turtle missed out on an extra part of childhood...like growing up without parents

leon: leonardo is responsible for my childhood self-confidence and leadership skills
mike: michelangelo was a big influence on my...pizza-eating

-coach and broach

c/o herschy

-coach and broach

at the taque,
the taqueria.
for great tacos y quesadillas.
por favor amigo,
un super burriiiiiiiito
at the taqueeeeeee,
taqueriiaaaaaaaa.

-coach and broach

oh glorious chipwich...so faithful and unwaivering in its acceptance to always playing backup to dove bar

-coach

i want to apologize to seth for taking advantage of him when he was in an extremely vulnerable state. id like to confess that i charged him $7 for a dove bar when he was real high. Im an asshole and i hope god, and seth, can forgive me for my sins.

-broach

please take a minute to complete the poll to the below
assume that the buddy list does not affect desktop icons or other windows by being on either side...just a matter of preference



-coach

so i just received 3 points out of 10 on my comp project...a step down from last weeks 4/8.

fuck.

-coach

here's a worst for you: so ive been sick the past couple a days and thus have had a good amount of boogers. So im in class today, sitting by the window. I kinda lean towards the window and get a good nose blow in, hoping no one would notice. After the nose blow i try to be real subtle about the "snot glance"-come on you all know damn well that after you blow your nose that you have to look at what you've produced; analyze the color, density, etc. (this is also comparable to the "poop glance" after a wipe)- despite the normality of this procedure, some girl caught my little snot glance and gave me THE WORST look ever. whatever i dont feel that bad- i know she does the same thing...fuckin whore.

-Broach

we're a postin', postin', postiiiiin'...postin' machiiiiine.

speaking of which, michael jackson is again wanted on molestation charges...in the words of the great GBiergo "i hope he can mooonwalk his way out of this one"

-coach and broach

puzzle update 1: in what could be the most industrious 2 hours of my life, i did some great puzzle work...after sorting through all of the 1026-piece bag, i have linked 13 pieces of homer's beard together, as well as found 3 2-piece random matches, separated all the edge pieces into the bag on the right, located all four corners, and gathered a SHITLOAD of random pieces in the box (most of which appear to be upside down), as seen in the picture.

in doing so i was reminded of such classic simpsons episodes as bart kissing ms. krabappal after passing 3rd grade and episode #1: bart the genius...the shot of the scrabble board comes up a lot...this also made for a great trivia question last night:
q: what is a big, fat, bafoon with a short temper
hint: the word bart makes up to cheat at scrabble when his parents think he is a genius

-coach

"you didn't forget today's column did you?"

-coach and broach

FINALLY jessi berrin makes herself useful, with a positive message to girls everywhere

Some Sisterly Advice on boys:
College Lesson #2:
Put Out or Get out!

acceptable to say the least...no need to rag on her for that one

-coach and broach

it has just come to my attention that celine dion not only has her own perfume...ahem, "parfum" ...but a website known as celinedionbeauty.com...i know im not the only one who realizes that celine dion is in fact one of the most unattractive "celebrities" to date.

also, no one wants to smell like an ugly person.
much less an ugly canadian.
dot com.

-coach

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&ncid=1756&e=1&u=/031119/ids_photos_sp/r4251977042.jpg
-pat

-coach and broach

new tv is here in its 24 inches of glory! i'll drink to that

-coach and broach

pat's away message- should be known by all

Berg of G: dude can i tell u a story
PDiDdY54: i would love a story
Berg of G: im really high...the end.

were just providers of entertainment for all here at coach and broach co.

-c & b

for all who havent seen, here is a picture, taken by muff, of a page of ocean drive magazine which contains a picture of cameron and paris hilton...the caption includes his name, first in fact, which is interesting

-coach and broach

our gumball machine was a huge success and a huge failure all at the same time...its only been out there a few hours and already we've gotten comments from practically everyone in the hall...unfortunately those comments include little more than "are you leon and mike? your gumball machine stole my quarter...a few actually."

turns out the jawbreakers were too big, have a free one on us.

-coach and broach

ok so apparently we missed some kind of victoria's secret show while attending the simpsons trivia contest...honestly, its a toss-up...
to all who saw the show, we would appreciate some comments describing your favorie scene/shot/tit/whatever.

-coach and broach

so we had a simpsons trivia contest here tonight in the campus center...while leon was unable to advance past the preliminaries hill coachandbroach.blogspot.com was well represented as is now the proud owner of a $10 gift certificate to california pizza kitchen and a 1026 piece homer jigsaw photomosaic puzzle (which looks to be impossible)...although the 5 foot cardboad homer standup was "not for sale," i was able to acquire a "tufts no-homers club" t-shirt.

comment with a good simpsons trivia question

-coach and broach

di smitty

-coach and broach

dom, we already have a friend named johnny v...choose a new alias per favore.

-c n b

c+b in the place to be see, and we got what it takes to rock the mic *right*

-ugh

fuck all you fuckers who 1. said we should allow comments and 2. say that we are slacking on posts, when it is thou who doth not comment.
in what could very well be the greatest disappointment of the 21st century, we have yet to here 1 scandalicious story about michelle pellicer...we thought this would be easy folks...kudos to dom, however, who did manage to muster up the word "skankonia"

-coach and broach

"i love twigs...they're like little tiny trees."

-broach's ladybroach

ladies and gentlemen, let us commemorate the birthing day of one sir ian aka "crazy bill" by being very crazy and masturbating frequently

happy birthday ur gift is on the way and ur guaranteed to love it

-coach and broach

"coach is on the online!"

-coach

from here on in we will have a daily, which will most likely turn iinto a weekly, roast. what we will do is simply post the name of a person we know and will allow for everyone to post whatever comments, tidbits, or stories about that person. COACH AND BROACH crew is in no way responsible for anyone's comments. Inevitably, we will start with:
MICHELL PELLICER
no need to be nice.

-coach and broach

well it all makes sense. my chem teacher is gay and thats why every time i try to do some of his fuckin chem work i feel like im getting fucked in the ass. so clear now.

-broach

I'm thinking balls are to men, what purses are to women. It's just a little bag but we'd feel naked in public without it.
-j me8593

-coach and broach

new smitty column

-coach and croach

pat: papers are the worst invention...since paper

-coach and broach

Auto response from Johnnyboy213 (2:21:23 AM): It seems ol' Paris Hilton has been in the news a lot lately. If you wanna give her a call and maybe chat some, here's her cell phone number: 310-990-7444

-coach and broach

winfights update =)

-coach and broach

ok so its been a week and i've only seen revolutions twice...i know i know, im ashamed...

-coach

i think its a little sad that me and mike are making comments for our own posts-i promise we wouldnt if you fuckers did every once in a while. (ill give you 8 monies)

-broach

coach: how good is monday night football when you don't have schools the next day?

broach: supreme.

-yall know who we fuckin be

late.

=;ate

note to self: get taqueria for pantry
<)={ '

edit: as well as girlfriend for fort
>=)

-coach

smitty quote of the millenium:
"i taped two mach3 blades together. now i have a mach6. twice the shaving power, half the time. my genius continues to reign unchecked."

check out the newest column if you haven't...and if you have...check it out again

-coach and broach

hey, did you know the best thing about college? MIAMI. im here and im loving every goddam second. and balls.

-brooach

kids, don't forget to drink your milk and eat your smitty columns...new one today =)

-coach and broach

so theres an amazing thing and a horrible thing about living in the freezing ass cold, and ironically theyre quite related. You know damn well that theres few things cooler than seeing ur breath outside. amazing right? WRONG!!! this awesome little feature of the north comes with horrible consequences. ive honestly caused myself to slightly hyperventilate because im constantly breathing out, trying to see my breath (and marvel at its amazingness). NOw eventhough this hyperventilation has happened on more than six occasions, i still think seeing ur breath is well worth the probable brain damage associated with lack of oxygen to the brain.

-soo lated on an october day and you know this

'-brrrrrroooooaaaccchhhhh guy.

a clean jerk

-coach and broach

not sure if we remembered to post this a few whiles ago but here it is

-coach and broach

1
2
3

vote for me

-coach

perhaps my obsession with berrin's away message is becoming unhealthy but it appears as though it has had a positive effect...she has begun using a smaller font, which is nice to see...however, anyone who uses the phrase "that's me" should be shot in the medula oblongata.

-coach

in commemoration of the 1000 hit milestone, let us celebrate with the adding of chocolate to milk.

-coach and broach

first off, i wanna apologize for not posting for like the past ten years- chem has eaten my life like a goat eats a metal can...or somehting like that. but where was i...oh yes- the custodian story- lets go. It all started on a dreary afternoon (today). theres this guy custodian- spanish(weird, i know)- whose really nice and i try to say hi to him in spanish whenever i see him. today was a huge back fire. so im casually walkin down the hall, i see him and give him the ol "como estas." he replied with "bien gracias." now this is where it usually ends- not today. Apparently he thinks my espanol is better than it is because after saying "bien gracias" he continued with "thhkdkjehallkdlkj lksjdlk jflskdhgyhreydnv" or atleast what sounded like that. So for literally five minutes were trying to break down what he was trying to convey- word for word. Finally, i am able to understand what he was trying to tell me-and boy im glad i did. It was translated as "I worked in the police building this morning." hmmmm....yeah. awesome. so after a "si, muy bien" on my part, i got the fuck out of there. ultimately, im just glad i was able to be part of "the most worthless conversation in the world." late

-senor broach

ye ye

-coach and broach

ladies and gentlemen, this installment of shut the fuck up berrin is one of the worst yet..

I LOVE YOU DANI BERRIN...YOU ARE AN AMAZING SISTER AND BEST FRIEND...AND I DONT KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO WITHOUT YOU! YOU DON'T DESERVE THIS...TRUST ME WHAT GOES AROUND, COMES AROUND!

shut the fuck up. ur ruining pink for cute girls everywhere by writing in captial letters.

-coach and broach

guess who's back

helluva find rok

-coach and broach

im still waiting for someone to come out and explain why the good people at abc make john madden and al michaels stand up whenever they take a shot of the commentator's box. is it because they can't get a good angle of them sitting down or is it just to look more "professional." they are never shown sitting down. do they think that no one will notice or are we supposed to believe that they stand the whole time? it makes no sense...cut the charade...we all know that when that camera's not on, john madden is sitting down. the man has done a lot for football, dont get me wrong, but unless you dangle a donut over his head, i see no reason for john madden to willingly stand on his feet for 3 hours.

-coach

http://www.shley.org/pics/05.jpg

edit: did anyone see this picture before it went down?

-coach and broach

today was pretty wack...

-coach

Auto response from A Spec0987 (8:08:47 PM): http://www.zone.ee/rennat/bloodcyber.htm

-coach and broach

if you don't have a camera, find someone who does cuz we want to see everyone's costume posted up here

-coach and broach

for all those who haven't noticed yet...this is gay

-coach and broach

thought this one deserved to be posted...

It's that time of the night...Hitting the Hay...gotta love "the jess lingo!"
(in pink)
(not cute girl pink, big pink)

-coach and broach

tuwesday andf late.; ;l;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;atteeellllllllllllllllllaaattttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeee
sooooooooooo llllkkllllllllllllllllllateeeeeeddd
and late happy boirthday tuajmnnnnnnnnn

-so lateee latee latettetetetetete briggggs

we've been sayin it for years

-coach and broach

Dear Valued Customer,

Thank you for contacting Dell eSupport and Services. We appreciate
the opportunity to assist you. I apologize for your trouble and
I assure you it is our hope that you have a positive experience
with our company.

It seems that the network adaptor is defective and the motherboard
needs to be replace.

I can set up a return-to-depot repair for this system.

w00t

-coach

edit: comments are back
i added some games to the links section on the right side...bubble trouble is currently the most popular...my high is 69408.
enjoy.

-coach

38,584 nyakka

-coach

dell:
Dear Mr. Vitiello,

Thank you for contacting Dell eSupport and Services. We appreciate
the opportunity to assist you. I apologize for your trouble and
I assure you it is our hope that you have a positive experience
with our company.

I would recommend you to update the network drivers for the issue
you are facing

me: i recommend you stop being such a faggot.

-coach

so apparently the deal is that my computer only works when its cold outside...

what the fuck

-coach

d0mmm (3:23:02 PM): i dunno man i was up till 6 fixing dads [computer]

lil dosman (3:23:34 PM): is it fixed

lil dosman (3:23:35 PM): ?

d0mmm (3:23:43 PM): the worst thing is that i originially fucked it up by resetting the router because my porn wasnt working

-coach

me: madonna and britney

Auto Response from Jocey123: now accepting original halloween costume ideas for 2 girls...me and taye!

you'll be the most popular girls at the party

-coach

my high is like 21,750- this game is amazing.

-broach

i campeones del mundo !

-coach and broach

i feel like jeans never need to be washed; am i wrong?

-broach

Auto response from IanP84 (5:58:36 PM): having great buttsex with michael and alex in 1743...if you could get a hand on any anal beeds please stop by w/ them...thanks

-coach and broach

current status: patiently waiting for a camel-jockey to explode on...why isnt that bastard calling my computer still doesn't work

>X 0

Berg of G (2:46:50 AM): yeah i thought there was something wring with my aim cause it says u have been on for an hour and 5 minutes

-coach

now that we have quotes can i hear some responses to my mystery movie quote from the other day:

Thursday, October 16, 2003

...
.....
p.s. mystery movie quote inspired by this post : "it is a lemon essence, and it is just delightful"
difficulty rating: Ooooo

-coach

special delivery care of de smitty

-coach and broach

onlizzle, nizzle
time me..

=/

i didnt believe in god until i learned of the greatest creation: the Dove Bar. i take off my yamakah and bow my head to thee.

llllllate

i feel like im cheating on my girlfriend when i indugle in a Dove bar.

-de bad bad broach

yeah so a dear friend of mine, a frequent of the site, and frankyly part of the family, asked me to write him a story. He needed this story for class, so i knew i had to put my heart into it.
this just flowed from my fingers:

LonnieJonesBro (10:40:20 PM): once upon there was a little goat named little johnny greenfoot everywhere he went he always loved to sing songs. now little johnny g was not like the other goats; no he wasnt at all. You see my friends, Little johnny was not a goat at all; he was dwarfed moose. Now know one knew that he was a moose midget except one mean little ass of a goat. he was the meanest goat in all the pasture. His name: Twizzler McGoatmuchies. one day while parusing the grasslands Twiz came up to jonny and told him that he knew Johnny's horrible secret. Johnny didnt know what to do. he knew that if anyone found out that he would exiled from the herd.
LonnieJonesBro (10:40:23 PM): Twizzle said that if johnny didnt give him half of his weekly milking, that he would tell everyone about Jonnys little difference. Well jonny didnt know what to do. Finally the idea Dawned on him: murder twizzle in a brutal accident and make it seem like an accident. Before he could attempt this, he was slaughtered by hunters.

-broa...oh shit we have hot pockets!

there is a god

-coachy mchappy

well i must have missed the memo, but apparently this sunday marked the beginning of "shave-and/or-pull-out-all-your-pubes-and-sprinkle-them-all-over-the-showers week," cuz its like a carpet in there.

disgusting

-coach

caption on allsports.com:

UM #26 replica jersey

Opposing running backs and receivers take cover. “The Hitman” is back and taking no prisoners. The #1 safety in the nation wears #26 for the University of Miami – and the only store in the nation carrying his jersey is All Sports. Fans can pick up their #26 replica Nike jerseys in home green. White and orange possibly available later in the season. Check back. Pick up a Nike #26 today and root the Canes onto victory this coming season.

-coach and broach

mcafee virus scan: no viruses found
me: suck me

-coach

comments finally added...nyakka!

-coach and broach

Berg of G (11:52:24 PM): im gonna have to turn my sound off because of u, get a working comp...

-coach

Auto response from IanP84 (8:10:31 PM): i am eating some home cooked pussy with my gierlfriend lauren

nice

-coach and broach

is it just me, or has volkswagen caught a lot of shit over the past few decades about being the car that hitler drove? here's my suggestion: use this as a marketing gimmick...i don't drive a volkswagen but i've been considering it...i mean out of all the cars he could have had, hitler chose to drive volkswagen, and he was one picky son of a bitch, was he not?


the fuhrer's choice
good enough for him, good enough for you.

-who else

so the other day this guy tells us that jessica biel (rumored to be a tufts jumbo) is inside this party...there is no need to lie about things like this...i mean, we each walked around this entire party with semis for nothing
uncool

-coach and broach

Auto response from A Spec0987 (2:41:23 AM): If you took the $160,000 you would spend on college and spent it on condoms ($.83 each), you could have sex 132 times a day, or 5.5 times an hour. If that sounds excessive, you could have sex 3 times a day, buy a keg per day (for entertainment), a Cadillac Escalade, and still have $11.85 left over for weed every day for 4 years...what the hell are we doing here???

dayam

-coach and broach

well what do you know? my computer has actually stayed online long enough for me to make a post...
yipee.

-a very angry coach

you know the canes gonna represent everywhere- we took this one straight to Boston college's ass- take a look at this. (compliments to dan tropin on finding this pic)

-C&B

definition of "you're my bitch"

-C&B

well as long as its national coming out day at tufts i guess i have to confess...i too have experimented with exfoliation...in my college years...some apricot stuff my girlfriend had

-coach

p.s. mystery movie quote inspired by this post : "it is a lemon essence, and it is just delightful"
difficulty rating: Ooooo

vamanos a los world series!

-el trenedor y el herm

Bassboss4 (9:05:45 PM): Dr. Allan Ropper, the chairman of the neurology department at Tufts University in Boston and Osbourne's physician, said tests had showed Osbourne did not have Parkinson's disease (news - web sites) and that his tremor was "coming under control with medication."

great joaoerb

-coach and broach

Auto Response from vAnDe1786: I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges....

-coachandbroach

thanks be to malady for giving me the gift of music...among others

-coach

so apparently its fall...all of the sudden...this morning i step outside and there's red and yellow leaves all over the ground
also the weather is amazing
crazy new england and its crazy...er..um...."seasons" thats the word

-coach

i had nothing to do with this one

-coach

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/tabs/d/dave_matthews_band/oh_ver2_tab.htm

=p

lady, u didn't get your (,) and we didn't even (!).

>=,

before this next post, despite its content, know that im not gay. That being said, ive recently found myself in the power of exfoliation. thats right, i use new dove exfoliating soap,and ive found not only am i magnificently soft and smooth, but ive become a better and more rounded person. thanx dove exfoliator.

-broach

a new addition has been made to the english language, derived somewhat from spanish. In spanish, a lot of stores that sell things just add an -eria to whatever their selling. I.E. taco place- taqueria; bakery- bakeria (or something in that sense). Ive come to realize that adding the suffix -eria to almost anything is not only useful, but its fun. Heres a couple of examples of how it can be used.
example 1:
"Hey there ol' sport, where you heading?"
-"oh i was just heading to the pooperia." (how much better than saying just bathroom?)
example 2:
"Hey there good fellow, you dont look so good. where u going?"
-"i dont feel good, im going to the pukeria." (here, you save time and energy, not to mention you get to say pukaria)
example 3:
"excuse me, mr van dam, do u know where i could go for something unexplainably pleasurable?"
-"i sure do mr. jones, three blocks on the left, right past the quadrangle, is the analbeaderia." (awesomeness- self explanative)

so there you have it, the newest most amazing thing in the world.

-broach

im gonna let everyone in on the most underrated chip on the market. are u ready? ok. Ruffles- cheddar and sour cream. dont hate- try it first. im sure many know the sheer awesomness of this fried delicasee, but for those who dont i beg you.

-briggity broach

i bet jeff conine is somewhat disappointed with his first ever career postseason homerun...nice hit but a solo shot in the eighth when we're winning 3-0 is somewhat anti-climactic

-coach

congratulations are due to you, jessi berrin...you're away message today was the gayest its been in quite some time

Lots to do...leave me a FAB message!

i don't know how you do it...it usually takes more than 5 words to make an away message so irritating

you can't really get the full effect without the colors but u get the idea...
if ur ever looking for something really gay to make you angry, check out her away from time to time

-coach

got some videos...u got ur choice, porno or monster trucks...
oh, and i got one thats both.

-jd mcnuget

a

pudge can't do it all himself

-coach

suck me derek lee- you goat.

-briggity broach

sometimes i wonder if love is the only guiding force in this world...

-a very solemn broach

i have to confess my baby, i have fallen in love with two others. their sweet names: easy mac and ms. dove bar. forgive me, my baby, for betraying your love.
apologies

-you know damn well im lated like a broach and lllllllate

mike just left for the motherland, leaving me here just wishing i was in the sunshine state. fuckin anal fuck i wanna go down soooooooo bad. atleast we got a big weekend.

-fuck

i dont think anyone knows the extent of shrinkage that occurs to the package during these 7 am lax practices. It really brings you back to the days when you were 6.

-broach

i wonder what a dancing nancy is.

-broach

lax practice again at 7 this morning...not too bad except for the copious amounts of frost on the frozen grass. thats right....ordering underarmour immediately, and possibly skiing glove warmers to be duct taped all over my gear...and onto my package...its like a shriveled icicle..

-coach

so this weekend was pretty crazy...we went to a semi-formal which was pretty cool and the drinks were flowing, however, you had to have the one thing that neither of us actually brought with us to college, a tie. so we went in one by one and dropped the tie out of the second story window...worked fine but took about a half hour...once inside, good times were indeed had by all

-coach and broach

ps: i just went to my comp class only to find it packed with people i had never seen before, and being taught by some chinese dude...thats right folks, i was an hour early.

-coach

our apologies to all for not having posted more posts this weekend...it was my birthday and we sorta went all out...my brother was here from miami which was one of the best things ever to grace hll hall...im feeling a senior-year transfer...or hoping for one anyway

-coach

iss my birfday!

-me

if you had $500 to spend on a honeymoon vacation, where do u think i (the proverbial "I") should go with my fiance? please let me know- send ideas to coachandbroach@yahoo.com

-briggity broach

so most people know we're starting a band with this kid matt from dreamstreet and that we were already on these psycho fans websites. here is an email that matt got from the head of one of the fan sites:

"i'll take the not repsonding to my other email as a no...Ok whatever hows The Juice? Who came up with that name? It's cool. Did you know you guys already have a street team and you've only been a band for...what, two weeks? I find that amusing. The girls don't even know what kind of music you play or the songs or anything, but already they're your biggest fans. I'm in a band too. We're called Sanity. I sing and write most of the songs and my friends play the music and sing back up. Alright then, yo tengo salir. Adios."

and by the way, a street team, i found out is a group of people that just promote the band and make fliers and shit. hahah- is this not too good, considering we have only practiced maybe once?

-famous coach and broachers

i feel like the people who write and/or draw shit in bathroom stalls should not be looked upon as vandals, but as entertainers. keep up the good work guys, i look forward to some new poem about my poop and/or weiner.

-broach

i just realized that i never actually finished describing the BC game to all our fans out there...well everyone saw the game and knew what happened but you all missed out on a wide world of shit-talking idiots from boston who got their respective asses handed to them...all in all everyone was real gay, but messing around with sebastian and the cheerleaders was funny as hell. i mean being able to heckle the shit out of tyler ingold from about 8 feet away was, all in all, one of the more entertaining aspects of the game, along with a touchdown by a certain star defensive back.

edit: -so tired i forgot to sign my post

so im finishing up my first paper at 6 am. lax practice starts at 7. how ironic then, that the night that i'm up til 6 will actually be the very first time im actually go to morning practice...i just hope i don't suck after 5 months of rigorous off season training in my other favorite sport: eating.

-coachy mccoach

so, yeah. im gonna say today was up there for one of the worst in a long while. ahhhh where to begin. so i already knew that i had to study a crazy amount for my chem test tmw- what i didnt know was that i also have a spanish test tmw that includes handing in a months worth of work from the workbook. frown. after that, i start studying chem and realize i know next to nothing. sucks. i also remembered 30 minutes before my chem lab that i HADNT DONE IT. so after barely finishing that it time, i get to the lab on time but only to realize i had left the lab report i had just done, in my dorm. so i had to, of course, run to the opposite side of campus( up hill) to go get it. OK. so it was 830 and i figured god had fucked with me enough. haha- of course he wasnt finished. so i head to the food place to get a nice little sub. most know that i am a former sandwich artist, so i know the quality of a sandwich when its made. So of course there out of the meat that i want, but thats no problem- as soon as she made it and did the folding i knew there was gonna be trouble. My walk back to my dorm i was just wondering how bad this sub would be. On opening the sandwich wrapper , ill be honest, i didnt think it could have been THIS bad. I swear to god that i just unwrapped the sandwich and it looked like this, with no manipulation. the nights not over but hopefully my AWESOME luck is.

-a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day-having broach

could the person who smashed my girlfriends window and stole her purse please return it and giver her $250 as soon as you can. thanx. :)

-broach

u know, whenever u get a chance...

-coach

so for all those who haven't yet heard, there's a rumor around here that our dorm building was formerly an insane asylum that was bought by the school during an expansion period. that's one of the most frightening things i've ever heard. there's this big counter in the lobby that has no function anymore but could very easliy have served as a reception desk in the past, not to mention the fact that in order to get into the hallways where the rooms are, u need an electronic key. some one way mirrors in the hallway also add a degree of unexplainable spookiness, but the kicker is definitely the intercoms in every room that "don't work anymore." how would you like trying to fall asleep while you think about that girl from the ring standing in your room for hours and hours...just standing! and if the sixth sense has taught me anything, it's that my fort offers no protection whatsoever. not even my superman poster can save me now.

-coach

warning: if schmeezy does not email the lady in charge of breaking up our triple I WILL BE THE ONE TO MOVE OUT!! =O this simply cannot happen.
loyal coachandbroachers, unite, and put a stop to this madness!

-coach!

so schmizzle officially did not come home last night...am i supposed to be worried? perhaps he is finally starting to fully understand the awkwardness between us and him and has decided that this weekend will be too weird if its 1 on 1.

-a somewhat lonseome coach

well, flow left for miami today...so that leaves just me and schmizzle for the weekend...interesting...we'll see how that turns out...for now, i believe i'll take a nap in my fort, goodlate

-coach

i dont care how convenient those nalgene water bottles are- if you have one, you're a douche.

-broach

we have to stop starting movies everynight at midnight or later...it could be the factor that is solely responsible for my rapid decline in morning-class-attendance

-a sleepy-eyed coach

im thoroughly intrigued by the concept of the anal bead, and actually quite curious...if anyone knows please send all emails to coachandbroach@yahoo.com
thanks 8 bunches

-id rather not say which

i'd like to thank the good people over at the bookstore for finally getting more child development books less than one week before the first test, giving me plenty of time to read chapters 1 through 6.

fuck u guys

-mad as a mad coach

HALL SNACKS ARE UNTASTIC. THEY DO WONDERS FOR THE BAD **** BLUES.

-lated aS GUYS: c&B

how fuckin good is that video- under "praise be to smitty" - if u havent seen it watch it NOWWW. the coach and broach crew has watched it easily 17 times. lalalalalate

-C&B

hey ladyyyyyyy...i come home in 10 seconds...

-the guy jones guy

if the link doesn't work, try right clicking and hitting save as...

praise be to smitty
be sure u can hear the dialogue

-coachandbroach

almost forgot to put up some pixs and describe the gamenight...let me start off by saying that leo suarez's uncle carlos is one of the best guys ever...hes incredible and i only wish that i had a picture of him wearing the canes bird foam head, because its unbelievable...there are, however, some pretty cool pictures, and messing around with sebastian was pretty cool...although sean did have a td in our corner, there was not time for a photo opp., due to the fact that i was busy going apeshit.

ok so, first we wandered around looking for tickets/booze/talking shit with stupid ass bc eagle fans...so after we get tickets at about $22 each, we end up in some ncaa play like the players kinda shit and decide to kick some field goals...leo kicked one and no one was quite sure as to the wearabouts. then fat intentionally kicked one out of the mini-arena and into the car of a tailgater somewheres...

so we wind up chilling with these tailgaters that are crazy nice and generous, after having to hear a lot of dumbass shit from bc fans...anyway...we notice about 5 guys wearing birdsuits that are simply amazing...they leave and eventually its just one guy...one guy trying to run game...trying to mack it in his bird suit. we made our way into the stadium.

i'm sorry but its 530 and i gotta sleep...i'll describe the rest of the game tomorrow

-coach

Auto response from Bassboss4 (4:48:11 AM): its always good when ur band is better the ur football team.
SEAN HAS TD.
OUT CALL CELL

word, word, and word. man.

-acoacha and abroacha

if u don't like our fire, then don't come around
cuz coach and broach gonna burn one dahhowhoowwwn
cuz we're gonna burn one....doooowwwwwnn...

-coachandbroach

playboys are to be stolen by 12 year olds, not bought by 18 year olds.

-coach

big weekend to welcome all the bros from around the globe (US). CANES vs bc- we gon shit on em.

-broach

9:15 pm. and the ones begin to come...and go.

-coach and broach

so my computer screen is getting continually worse- the cracks are getting bigger and longer, and eventually will envelop all that is my beloved screen.

- a sad and soon computerscreenless broach

attention: the underwear advisory warning has been raised to orange...this means that i haven't done laundry in quite a while and am now functioning on little to no underwear in the cool bostonian nights.

-coach

behold, friends...our prayers have been answered..

-coach mikey

sorry for the delay, but here's the picture of flow's screen for all interested...
one word: late

-coach

question on the day:
would you rather drink milk straight from the teat of a goat (and i mean sucking that teat off real good) or insert a pinky into the anus of that same goat?

now thats a thinker

-c & b

i went to the health services today, pretending my stomach hurt, but really just stole about 20 condoms. thankyou for the free handouts.

-broach

so today was the day, first day of lacrosse practice: 6:20 wake up- hit the fields by 6:45. despite falling asleep at 3:30 i still get out of bed at 6:20, got dressed, packed my bag, ate my cereal bar, and headed out the door. I step outside and its raining pretty hard- s oi say fuck it and go back to sleep. maybe thursday we'll give it another shot.

-broach

ämp fans, have no fear...although the band has geographically dispersed, we at tufts have been talking with former dreamstreet member matt ballinger about working on a new project...

the following news update comes from the dreamstreet fan site www.downondreamstreet.com (click on latest news)

while matty b is anxious to rekindle his musical career, ämps involved in the project intend to add a somewhat more badass edge to the group in order to differentiate it from the pop icon's former genre.

-coach and broach

its that time again- question of the day:

(in no way are the coachandbroach co. attempting to take credit for this question- just posting it)
if you were a hot dog, and you were starving, would you eat yourself?

-c & b

white male seeks friendly asian to fix computer.
interesting trades considered.

-coach

for anyone who enjoys a good beef jerky, im gonna have to say "oh boy oberto" teriyaki is the way to go. just a thought.

-broach

this is to the person(s) who informed my parents about my website- which of course now they frequent cuz of you, SUCK MY FUCKING DICK. ARE U A FUCKING IDIOT? I WILL SHIT DOWN YOUR THROAT AND MAKE YOU TOSS MY SALAD AT THE SAME TIME. good day.

-a very mad broach

so i woke up yesterday morning and turned on my computer. something was different, i just couldnt tell what it was. After several moments of deep thought and concentration, it dawned on me. The 12 cracks across the screen werent FUCKING there before. the computer still works but i cant use it for more than ten minutes without getting dizzy. if anyone knows how my screen cracked id be obliged to know. fuck. fuck. fuck. cock. balls.

-broach

were gonna try and do this every day: were gonna ask "the question of the day," and u send us your answer.
question of the day: if u were in a hot tub full of vomit up to ur shoulders and someone was gonna pour steaming diharrea on ur head, would you duck ur head into the vomit?
we'll post the best e-mail response we get.

-C&B

we are now officially "The Juice". were planning on going platinum in a couple months so buy the cd.

-coach and broach

i think the barber didnt like me. (tear).

-broach

are you sure i didn't dream that?

edit: im sure i did...but it could have been both...i love you =p

-coach

super soakers were even great if you were a girl...i remember the good ol' days when a bunch of us would run around in white t-shirts, shooting each other until our shirts were completely soaked, and boy it was super.

-ladycoach

"being half-naked means having one nut showing," some fucking guy.

-coachandbroach

almost too good.

-coach

how good were super soakers?

-broach

for those uninformed people, mike is coach and i (mr. leon) am broach.

-broach

so we pretty much cashed the whole 30 pack last night. apparently we were shittier than i realized. all i remember is our roommate shmizzle playing the flute. right now i cant tell if im hung over or still drunk but either way im a happy camper when all is said and done.

-broach

its 345 and i get to go see my lady approximately 12 hours from now...get pumped up
=p

-coach

can anyone guess the first thing i did with my atm pin number once i received it in the mail? if you said, "lost it," you are correct.

-coach

so were still thinking of a new name for our new band- so far we have a few ideas we wanna throw out there; let us know what you think: the balls, ämp street, the lazy nutsacks, vision,definition of, and incubus. my favorite is obviously the lazy nutsacks, but your input counts. you can email us at coachandbroach@yahoo.com THANKYOUOUOUOUOUOU

-coach and broach

i had my first chem lab tonight. my lab instructor, Hen Chon, was, we'll say, sub-par in the speaking of the language we like to call english. in fact, one might assume he arrived in this country within the last three hours. Of all the entertainment i got out of mr. chon, id like to share my favorite. when i entered the lab he asked me "where yoh googels?" i tried not to laugh in his face when i realized he meant goggles. googles is now the word of the day.

-broach

just thought everyone should know that we got a new band in the making- thats all we'll say for now. in no way does this mean that the ämps' days are over. nevertheless, we are now accepting suggestions for a band name. late.

-coach and broach

to those who need a poem about horses:

gallop, cantor, oh so magnificent
manes flicker in the wind
as my soul is drowned out by the clippity clop
of love
hay, like wine, flows through my veins
as the cherry blossoms bloom.
as the cherry blossoms bloom.
the end

i hope that helps out anyone who needed a poem about horses.

-broach

ANYONE WHO GETS OFFENDED BY THE WORD"PUSSY", OR OTHER TERMS OF THAT NATURE, SHOULD NOT BE READING THIS MOTHER-FUCKIN SITE. CUZ MOST LIKELY YOU'RE THE ONE WHO IS THE PUSSY.
thankyou.

-coach and broach

everyone knows there's no girls like miami girls. this goes without saying...however, until now we have been unable to explain the situation more precisely than that...here goes...
recent bostonian research has shown empirical evidence in that the pussy depreciation effect or "PDE" is due to a downshift in the magnitude and rangitude of the standard miamian richter scale, from a scope of 0 to an asymptotical 100, to a scope of a hideous -15 to a mere 85. were not gonna lie people, besides the occasional diamonds in the rough (of which maybe 2 have been spotted), the girls here are a little better than hairy-scary caliber. ok, wont go that far, but they're anus-caliber for sure.

we love our ladies.

-coach and broach

i'm on a roll...two nights in a row without falling off the top bunk and tumbling to a bloody demise.

-broach

well we bunked up our beds to make room for a futon...thats working out alright...except nobody has come to stay with us besides schmizzle's gf

on a lighter note, dave tickets have arrived and our in our posession

-coach and broach

i think easliy the worst thing since unsliced bread is computer pop-ups. easily.

-broach

DAVE TOMORROW...

YYYYYYIIIPPPPEEEEEEEE!!!!

-coach and broach

forgive us for our laziness...its the weekend...

-coach and broach

what u know bout dem miami boys????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we just wanted to make you bitches think u had a chance. HA.

-coach and broach

we should get more shittier

-coach and broach

cut. cut cut cut cut cut. but you know what? if any of those bitches ever tried out for the ämps- theyd get shit on for being such pussy ass bitches fuckers who love cock in there ass and shit down their throat- but im not bitter.

-broach

so i just came back from the a capella audition and im thinking it doesnt look good. not cuz im not a motherfuckin ämp when it comes to singing, but more cuz they take like gay-ass operah bitches with gay voices. if i make it- i take all that back. i find out later tonight, and im already drunk so who gives a fuck?

-de jones bro

also, thanks to blake for telling us how to fix the pictures...
everyone, the pictures are now working

-coach and broach

today leo fell down...it was pretty funny...nonetheless we should all wish him the best of luck in his singing auditions

-coach

so last night we rocked hill hall with an acoustic ämp performance...we're now the "guitar guy" and the guy who "should audition for an a capella group"...a success overall

-coach and broach

and its official: WE GOT DAVE TICKETS. ATHANKYOU.

-coach and broach

never in my life have i ever gotten more compliments for an article of clothing that i did today with my "yankees suck" t-shirt. maybe its cuz the yankees actually chomp enormous cock. lots of love.

-broach

here are some pictures of one of the "billion" ämps performances. enjoy.
one
two

-coach and broach

by the fucking way- i heard that there were these guys that were participating in this thing where you get ass raped- takes place on saturday. whats their name again...? oh yeah the florida gators.

-coach and broach

apparently the picture-hosting site is being real gay and asking for logins...until we get it working with another site i guess we'll just do this:
login: coachandbroach
password: password

-coach

here's a picture from a couple of nights ago, when pat was out here; taken early in the night.
here's a picture from a couple of nights ago, when pat was out here; taken later in the night.
do you see anything noticeably different between the two?

-coachandbroach

i have permanent IBH. next album entitled "i invented the re-wipe."

-broach

more pictures coming tommorrow...now i go to bed...class at 10:30

-coach mike

in this picture, you cant really tell, but were pissing on the president's lawn- muahahhahaha

i (coach) took the picture while peeing drunkenly...thus explains the weird face and overexposure...lAte

-coach and broach

damn you refried beans.

-coach

grrrrrreat: http://www.unf.com/

-coach and broach

don't know why i haven't posted this until now but the other night, in a drunken stupor, i tripped and fell while we were running through the hallway of our dorm, being loud and drunk and drawing wangs on peoples' whiteboards, and burned my hand pretty bad on the carpet...it sucked...i took a moment to reflect on some of the shit that seems to happen with the sole purpose of killing your buzz...then cracked open a cold one

-coach

fuck. i just made an appt. for an audition for the beelzebubs a capella group. what the fuck am i thinking? theres only one thing that can save me now- two coins.

-broach

so we just bought a broom, but in no way does that mean our room will get any cleaner.

-coach and broach

so me and mike are pretty much the only assholes wearing sweatshirts and pants. for everyone taking the sat's in the next year, look out for this analogy:
sun:fun as cold:so fucking gay

-a freezing in summer idiot (broach)

so i just got a new cell phone- 617-901-4225. i was hoping i could pick the last four digits cuz that would just lead to sheer amazingness- i wanted something llike 202-2687 aka 202-anus- u know? something amazing like that, but the best i could do with mine was 901-hack. sub-par to say the least.

-broach

so tonight i saw a chinese guy wearing a little head light like one of those ones that miners wear deep in de caves...but a hi-tech one...he looked like some kind of seminefrious tubloidial buttnoid...it was crazy

-coach

tonight we went to the tufts a capella o-show to hear some of the singing groups here...it was sweet...a capella is the craziest thing ever...leo's trying out for the beelzebub's, the oldest all-male and generally considered the best a capella group on campus...download some of their shiznat on kazaa cuz its awesome

-coach

our dining halls don't serve dinner past 7. yay.
late.

-coach and broach

so a couple nights ago, pat came in town from boston to party with us, jumbo style...we got pretty shitty and spent a great deal of time fucking with our thrid roommate's friends on his computer...needless to say we were extremely embarrassed in the morning when he mentioned that we should stay off his computer and that he had to go home to a crying girlfriend

on a lighter note, it was still kinda funny
please take a moment to enjoy the following im:

PDiDdY54: oh, did ur roommate say anything to u guys?
LonnieJonesBro: ha
LonnieJonesBro: yea
LonnieJonesBro: he was pissed
LonnieJonesBro: what did u say to his girlfriend
PDiDdY54: haha
PDiDdY54: i dont even remember
PDiDdY54: i think we broke up

-coach and broach

there needs to be a word for the emotion i feel for my bean bag gaming chair...
and my lady is also the best lady...love you!

-coach

apparently my mom doesnt think astronomy is an ok class. whore.

-lonnie broach jones

"im gonna go enhance my brain, while you waste urs away"

-best

also...here's a picture of "some guy" and our fridge, which was full last night...of ones...we made short work of that...

-coach mike

we bought some plants for good feng shui and chi...
edit: plant picture successfully posted..link should work

-coach

a lot.

-coach and broach

we love and miss our girlfriends

-coach and broach

so our camera is broken...sucks...i think we lated it earlier with a nasty spill...we would like to upload some pictures but it looks like thats not going to happen...somebody call james to fix the technical difficulties...late

-coach

so we just installed an incredible device on our smoke detector. we call it "the smoke bubble"...maybe a smoke cocoon. here's a picture of it: if u look closely, u can see the goldfish that were left in the "smoke bubble" before it was a smoke bubble.

-coach and broach

"well bro, you know...one time is was thinking...and i was dreaming if you maybe dream. ok. so we were swimming in de ocean dis one time, you knows? and i was just like, 'i would love to be a dolphin.' you know? and it's like...me too. so that was the third time i got crabs. and, by the way, by the way...i have good feng shui.
um. well...im gonna have to say...um, late bro...we will be keeping in touch very soon...LATE!"
-lonnie "broach" jones

that was our first post...

-coach and broach